Do you think we, as human beings yet, no more than animals with a supposed larger brain than most animals, are really supposed to be monogamous? I mean, really.
You and me with one person forever and ever until death, amen, monogamous? If you think yes, then what about those who are divorced? I mean, ultimately they will be out on the prowl again as soon as they are ready to get back in the saddle. Those who are married still very much look, gesture, speculate, daydream, and imagine what it would be like to be with someone else. Sure, they may go home to their wife, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend, yet, the image, daydream that made them grit their teeth of whatever fantasy it just was that went through their head, is still there.
So, are we really supposed to be monogamous? Forever and ever, amen?
I got to thinking.
Here are my answer to his questions about love and feelings and such.
Where: South Pacific, in a hut in the ocean. You know, one of those huts that's actually in the ocean? And it's always nice in the south pacific, so it's warm, but not unbearable.
We are naked. Both physically and emotionally, naked.
We are both in bed on clean white pima cotton sheets and we share everything that needs to be shared and that we want to share. It's completely open between us and there are no walls, no boundaries, no strings between us; it is completely open and honest between us.
The music is our words and conversation and the sounds are the ocean and the love and lust of our passion and love.
The smells are the ocean and our bodies, the sweet, sweet lovely smell of sweat, love, lust, and passion.
Food? It's not even a thought until we are starved.
Do I fall in love easily? Ah, no.
Lust? Crushes? Passion? Flirt? Oh, yeah.
I have a new crush almost everyday. I have a new flirt every hour.
Life is too much fun. Life is too short. Life is a verb. We should all have flirts, crushes and passions. We should all have the freedom to fall in love easily. Sadly, we have too many bad memories of past loves gone bad, past crushes crushing us.....
As I got to the last part about crushes crushing us I wondered, how and when did we become jaded? I mean, let's face it, we are a jaded crowd. Cynical too. Not saying there is anything wrong with it, just sayin'.
Did it happen in junior high with the cruelty of classmates? Did it happen because of our parent's failed marriage(s)? Did it happen because we were willing to go out on a limb only to have it sawed off while we were out on the end? Or because you got caught cheating with his bf and he took his anger out on you? Was it because we were cheated on, or were the cheater, one too many times? And really, how many times are too many or too few before we stop trusting when our partner sought sex and it wasn't with us?
I don't know. Maybe asking a question like, when did we become jaded is like asking, when did you fall in love with someone? I mean do we ever know when we fall in love with someone? Do we ever know the moment we fall out of love with someone, when the relationship is over, when we are ready to call it quits, when the relationship should and must end. The moment when we know it and then actually follow through with it.
I don't know. I do know what I'm looking for. Sure, of course, I have a laundry list of qualities and attributes I want my man to have, of course. I'll get to that another time, but I'm talking about feelings and emotions that I want with my man.
I want to be naked, physically and emotionally naked, completely open and unafraid. I want him to accept me, completely totally and whole-heartedly, accept me, me. Me for me and all of me. The good, the bad, the ugly, the hyper, the cynical, the enthusiastic, doe-eyed, wide-eyed, running into the world, woman that I am. I want to look into his eyes and see my reflection reflected back at me and be able to see and accept how he sees me, how he sees me in his eyes and how completely wonderful that is. Yep, that's it, that's what I want: I want a man who when I look in his eyes he sees the me that I want to see and the me that I am, the perfectly beautiful sexy flawed me and he loves every inch of it.
