It's Raining Men!

Not really but it's a good gay song! It is raining a lot here, two days non-stop. We closed the course yesterday because @ 2 pm three holes were underwater. I'm sure today they drowned!

Nick is so hot. Thats all I'm going to say about that. I like. A lot.

Faith had to cancel plans yet again. Her husband is so pyschotic. He asked her yesterday how it would feel if she never woke up!!! How the hell is she supposed to know? Clearly the guy is phucking nuts.

I stayed home lastnight. I didn't do jack. We ordered Chinese and cheesecake and stayed in & watched dvds. I ended up falling asleep early. Becca woke me up @ 7 this morning to go with her to her friend Shelly's house to get ready for an open house there. She's selling her home for $500,000. It's nice but I'm not interested.

We looked @ her pictures and talked shit about everyone from our old high school! The lesbian Cheney girl, the whores, etc... We broke out the cheap White Zinfindel and started drinking and talking drama. Then we got into the Bourbon and I had to quit! That she is too much for me. We started to get tipsy so we decided Shelly needed pumpkins! We went to this Orchard and got pumpkins and mums. She decided that she wanted to buy flowers and pumpkins for her friend Andy. I had to stop her. Purple mums = a fag. Yellow mums is okay!!! We had a lot of fun in the apple orchard picking Apples too :) Then we went to the Apple Valley Bakery which made the Washingtonian magazine and had the best Coffee cake and Sumatra coffee. It was a lot of fun. We finally managed to get back home and then I fell asleep!

My parents came out and wanted us to go to dinner. I sent everyone on their merry way and slept my buzz off. I'm so bored right now. It's 8:30 and I'm bored out of my mind. I just may call and invite Nick or Andrew or Zac or Dash or whoever the fuck I want over!!! Nah, I'm not. That would be too much work & maintence and i'm lounging in my pajama jammy jams with a severe case of cabin fever.

Ya know...The sound of the rain is great background music to lots of lovemaking!!!!

I just realized, I'm lonely. Damn.

I'm sad.

Bleh!

My own pity party

I'm still sick. I don't feel well @ all. I should see the dr. Dr Drew thinks I have the avaian flu...just kidding. Yikes! I shouldn't say that. It's far from funny. I'm scared of that shit.

Taylor Behl's body was found in Mathews County near the Cheasepeake behind a barn in a shallow grave. Turns out they found the farm through a photograph that the satanic fucking bastard took of the place. The odor was overwhelming and the FBI knew that her body was there as soon as they arrived--All of that from FOX news. I can't even wrap my mind around a punishment that would probably be harsh enough for this pyschopath.

Speaking of which Becca may be dealing with one. Mr. Baker. She's met him twice @ work. He told her that shes the only woman besides his wife that he has ever looked @ in a loving way. He told her that she was too beautiful and it kills him to look @ her. She is scared. Her boss told her that Mr. Baker was a strange man and he assured her that it would never happen again. I've always said we were loser magnets.

Holy shit! PYSCHO MAN AGAIN! Tuesday evening Becca, Emma & I were having dinner @ this restaraunt 30 mins from my house. This weirdo was sitting 4 tables behind Becca and 4 tables in front of me....The restaurant wasn't overfilled. About 5-10 other people in the dining room along with us. WEIRDO started talking aloud to the waitress wanting to know what was the ingrediants in his meal!! DUMB. He was telling her how great it was and he loved it, blah blah blah. Because he was talking so loud Emma turned around and was staring @ him because he was stupid! And out of nowhere, really loud--PEEK A BOO! PEEK A BOO!! PEEK A BOO!!! So loud and retarded. Emma looked at us as if asking WTF is that?! PEEK A BOO! PEEK A BOO PEEK A BOO!! Becca & I just started laughing because we have never seen someone do that to strangers in a restaurant in front other guests!!! We found it funny. At first. Then he wouldn't stop. It was annoying the other guests too. After about 20 mins of PEEK A BOO Emma started ignoring him and she probably sensed he was a weirdo. The hostess seated a couple in front of me, behind Becca to break up the one man game of PEEK A BOO. He said to the couple-ver betam-"I may have to ask you to find another table because me and the lady (he was referring to Emma) are having a game of Peek A Boo. And I heard on the radio that if you play you will stay young and I'm playing Peek A Boo". We couldn't believe our ears!!! So we got the check and the Manager came over and told us that he was going to pay for our check because he knew that the guest was bothering us and we really didn't have a nice dinner as nobody finished their meals or drinks! Nice gesture. Then WEIRDO asked for his check and the manager followed us to the door and waited outside as we left the parking lot. WEIRDO followed us to Barnes & Noble!!! We told the mall security and they said they'll keep an eye out on him. We wanted to leave so the B & N loss prevention guy said that he was in the Children's section sitting on the train and they were going to watch the weird bastard. I'm wondering why is it us that always come in contact with the weird mohuckers? Why are we magnets?

Becca & I agreed that he was definetly a child molester. He was so sick. His teeth were yellow. He never brushed them and he was wearing thick black glasses from the 60's. Horrible looking fat guy. Spooky. I couldn't sleep much after that.

Emma shopping with us :)



She's thinking "I make these look good"

Showing me what she thinks of the destressed jeans @ Express:



"DO THESE MAKE MY BUTT LOOK BIG, MINI?"



She's so smart :) She's such a girly girl. She bought a black leather handbag with faux fur on it, she's becoming her own woman!!!

I miss him.

Mr Navy


He got away.

Damn hes hot.

PS The sex was good.

Allow me

To introduce to you....

Mr & Mrs Brokeass :)

Daaaasssshhhh

From Dash: So special.....I feel like you are a unique person Amaya...is that true? I mean I've never seen anyone so self-possessed and strong...and sensually attractive.

I think he's hitting on me ;)

Honestly, he sees me. He's hot. He just may get it :)

Me

I'm sick. I have a cold that will not go away. I haven't felt well in days. I'm still working though. Such a trooper :)

Dad has to have surgery. I just learned that this a.m. Thats a big shocker.

I have lots of work to do but don't feel like doing it.

Bleh...

It's Monday night and I'm sick with a cold. So much has happened within the past 72 hours I figured I should share it...

1. Adam called me on Sunday just to tell me that he misses me & can't help but think of me when he should be concentrating on "Heather"! Thats his fiancee. They're supposed to get married July 3, 2006. He wants to see me soon. I havent seen him since Roderick died nearly a year ago. He's still the best of the best.

2. Brokeass Mike got married & moved to Seattle! How retarded is that? He always wanted us to do that. I could never. He's such a party boy it's disgusting. She isn't ugly either. Her name is Marci. I'm sure they're having fun, but will it last. He's a committment phobe! I can't believe he got rid of Pyscho Britney. Whatever the case may be, I know he reads this so I wish him all the best. Oh p.s. He's unemployed!!!

3. Married Mike found out that his wife is cheating on him with an older man who probably has more money than he has. Shame. Karma is a bitch.

4. Kenny got a job promotion and moved into a hot place on the beach!!! He's doing so well. I'm probably most proudest of him. He is my baby. <3 my Kenny. Can't wait to see him in NYC.

5. Dr. Chang is currently dating other girls. Ashley a fashion student, 21 & Alissa a dentist, 25 He's doing well too.

6. Grant is so sweet too. He's no longer the master of his domain!!!
7. Charles just broke up with the girlfriend. He failed to mention he had one.

8. Andrew the eyeglass wearing hottie will be here on the 7th. MMmmm.

9. Faith is having problems in her marriage still. She won't leave the fucking bastard. He's making her crazy.

10. Trish had surgery and is doing well.

11. Haven & Becca is doing well.
12. I'm sick. Because of the weather change I have a sore throat & earache!
13. Dash is producing a commercial in Baltimore and wants to hang out. He just wants sex.

14. Can't wait to see Mark & Pierre this weekend. Soooooooooooo hot!

15. Work is good. I'm becoming shy. I get embarrassed easily. Long story.



Take care everybody & email me :)

I won't be updating my journal much during the month of October it's a busy work month for me!

Road trip Nov. 2nd :) Can't hardly wait!!!


Muah Muah Muah!!!


PS--T, I hope you don't mind that I lied to Eric about you & me doing the nasty. I had to hurt him some way!!!

Weirdest thing!

So I met Zac yesterday... Zac is 28, brown hair, blue eyes, great looking guy. We didn't talk that much because of the circumstances--I'll explain that another time. Seems like he would be a lot of fun. I didn't give him my phone number though.

Nick is 25. Nick is Italian. Nick is goregous. Nick has a lot of girls! He got my phone number about 2 weeks ago, he's from Bethesda. We haven't been able to hang out because our schedules conflict. He's leaving town tommorrow for a bachelor party.

I recieved an email from Nick yesterday! He wanted to let me know that ZAC was his boy!!! How freaking crazy is that?!

Just Amaya's luck! And I know the golden rule--BROS BEFORE HOS & Chicks before dicks!!!

Nick is really anxious to hang out now though...I have to admit, this is all pretty petty but I can't wait to see how this all turns out :)

I have a date tommorrow night--can't wait!

What a weekend!

My week started off very boring, the typical weekday shit--catching up on all the weeks shit, dinners @ home, watching dvds....drinking a glass of wine before bed, painting my toes, the norm. Friday evening I was back in Chicago to spend the weekend with Eric. I love this guy! He picked me up @ O'hare and we went back to his place. We both agreed that our painting was beautiful. He wants to keep it over his bed because 'his goddess of lovemaking' painted it with him.

So he made me a cosmo and we sat on the rooftop just catching up and it felt like forever since I had seen him. Being with him and smelling his skin and feeling his embrace felt like home to me. He couldn't keep his hands off of me. He couldn't get enough of me!!! He took my martini and poured some on my tit and teasingly licked it off. Our clothes were off in seconds after that and we were fucking the only way we know how--fast, rough, and hard on his rooftop. All the noise from the windy city made it even that much better.

Saturday was awesome. we went to brunch then on to Michigan Avenue for shopping. He & picked out the perfect "fuck me" shoes. I'm stoked about them. Strappy, black and 4 inch heels!

So Nick called and his ass wanted to party. And thats exactly what we did! We went downtown to the Goldcoast. Along the way we stopped by Moda & Level for drinks. Chicago guys love a southern girl! I guess thats why I always stick with the Windy City boys. After several cocktails, Eric and I hailed a cab and we were practically fucking in the cab. We got to his front door sans my thongs and I think he ruined the zipper on my new dress trying to rip it off of me. The man practically broke me in two! He's an animal in bed and pulling his hair only made him fuck me harder!!!

It was a great weekend and after having sex @ Ohare 2 times before my flight we vowed that next time wouldn't be so far away.

Eric, thanks for a fun weekend. Thanks for the shopping, the hospitality and most of all, thanks for the Orgasms!

See you soon!

Me? A Bitch?

I haven't really been myself in over 3 weeks. I've been feeling really shitty lately about myself and my karma hasn't really been good to me. It all came to a head on Wednesday. And part of me is glad that now I have closure. "It's" over and done. I must say I did finally attempt to be a friend. I put effort forth, can you believe that?! As crazy as that is, it's true!!!

He made me feel like shit. And a lot of what he said made sense to me and that is why I have been feeling so down. A lot of my friends have noticed and have even told me that I need to just get laid to release all of the pent up anger. It's not like the oppourtunities aren't there, it's just I know that being a whore is not the way to make oneself feel better. I don't need more to regret in the morning, ya know.

My friends have been so good to me. Brandy & Davy sent me flowers just to make me smile. Becca gave me a massage. T, who is always there for me lended an ear and allowed me to just bitch and cry uncontrollably while he was working!!! Trish picked up my dry cleaning, Haven spent the night with me and slept with me in my bed and comforted me, Grandma made a peanut butter pie and drizzled "Amaya" on top the whip cream in chocolate syrup, it got so bad that Kenny even said "If this is the new Amaya--It's unattractive and I don't like it!" I called him sensetive since he couldn't deal with my hard side. It's just not me. I'm the sweetest of the sweet, right?!

So Wednesday after I said what I had to say and so did he, I told him to fuck himself. I felt so much better. Its what I needed. I didn't want to go home so I kept driving. I drove to the so beautiful Shenandoah National Park, Skyland drive and I sat at the Stony Man Overlook and just kept crying and crying and breathing and reminding myself of what my Mother has always told me, everything happens for a reason. As the sun was setting I told myself that the day is over and it has been a horrible one, but tommorrow is a new day and I have a chance to make it a better one. As the sun went down so did all of the memories and dreams and things that went undone. I deleted all the numbers that I had for him, his mothers numbers, his office...It all went down with the sun on Wednesday. I knew it was what was best for us. This was killing the both of us. The atmosphere was so beautiful. The leaves are turning colors from a dull green to a bright red, orange and gold and it gave me hope because now the leaves will change and so will I. I won't be dwelling on what could have been anymore. And just like the leaves my future is looking brighter and colorful. As I took my time driving from the Park, I saw a bear crossing the road with a doe and her fawn and I thought if a bear can live in the same mtn with two of the most innocent of creatures than I can too. (Don't try to read into that too much) After blasting Jeff Buckley's "Hallejuah" and crying to "I've been here before, I've seen this room and I've walked this floor. I used to live alone before I knew ya and I've seen your flag on the marble arch and love is not a victory march, It's a cold and it's a broken Hallejuah". I cried until I came to the nearest department store where I bought a purse for next to nothing and and bought Britney Spears Fantasy purfume...it made me feel better. The song has always helped me get over a lot of shit in my past even moving from school into the real world....

Wednesday was good for me.

Off the record

POLL

1. How old are you/male or female? 26 Female
2. How many people have you slept with? I can't count that high!
3. Lost virginity at what age? 15
4. How many blow jobs/oral sex have you given? Two
6. How many one nightstands? Three is the magic number!
7. Ever banged your friend’s significant other? no -- I do have some morals
8. Ever cheated? yep
9. How often do you masturbate? 5-7 times a week
10. What do you masturbate to? Improving on the great sex I have had or imagined
11. Most forbidden person you wanted to bang? An ex
12. Ever had a gay/lesbian experience? I'm pleading the fifth.
13. Like the taste of pussy? On my fingers?!
14. Like the taste of cum? A lot.
15. Use toys? Do veggies count?
16. Ever masturbated at work? Yes
17. Craziest place you've had sex? Golf course by the 18th
18. Like anal? Only on boring Mondays
19. Foot fetish? Negative, ghostrider!
20. Weirdest thing you have masturbated with? my tray table on a plane
21. Met anyone off Craig’s List and had sex the first night? Yes and No
22. How many porn’s do you have? Zippy
23. Faked an orgasm? unfortunately, yes
24. Favorite position? Me on top makes me scream the most!
25. Ever paid for sex? Not with money, but someway, somehow I had to pay.
26. Ever had sex in a club? Entre Nous with Jason A.
27. How many is too many? It's never enough.
28. Ever had group sex? not yet
30. Ever had cyber sex? Not my forte.
31. Phone sex? Once during a long distance relationship, and again on a weird fling.
32. Dirtiest fantasy? As a teacher, fucking a 17 year old male virgin and liking it! ONLY a FANTASY!
33. Ever taped yourself? Uh huh
34. Taken dirty pictures? Yes.
35. Ever had sex with someone and didn’t know his or her name? I do have standards.
36. Ever had sex with anyone famous? Yes and infamous.
37. Feel like masturbating now? yes -- I'm awake aren't I??
38. Fucked a co-worker? Client, does that ciunt?
39. Used someone? No more than they used me...I'm a pleaser NOT a user
40. Consider fucking someone who writes you as a result of this poll? Depends on how good a sense of humor he has...afterall there is MORE to hanging out than just sex...hehe

Morning!

*Morning Runs
*Hour long showers
*Paris Hilton Purfume
*Cute Shoes
*Chai Tea with Whipped cream and shaved ice
*Poison's Life Goes On playing on and on
*Running late for work....

All make for a great day!

See ya on the Course!!!

BLOCTOBERFEST

Blocftober Fest!! in Arlington This Saturday.. whos going????????????? lets do it up!! :)

The Advertising Slogan Generator

There's More Than One Way To Eat A Maya.

A Wonderful Event!

I was cordially invited to my friend David's outdoor, afternoon wedding. It was better than I expected. The fall color scheme against the white resin folding chairs turned out well. The wedding party's attire was very nice. The bridesmaids each wore an entire different color. It all worked out well together. I wasn't expecting it to, but it did!
The emotional, yet classic ceremony was short, but it was nice. I did buy the Purple Bebe dress this morning afterall. I was absolutely sure of it. The white number was a bit Las Vegas showgirl'ish and I felt that white would be too much for me to wear. Afterall I wouldn't want to show up the bride!
My stylist put my hair in Chignon after seeing my dress. He thought that the neckline and the classic cut of the deep purple dress needed to be exposed. I didn't feel that my Tiffany earrings were good enough for the wedding. They were probably too much! So my stylist went with me to a boutique and he helped dress me. I've decided that I love having someone who knows fashion and is setting trends everyday helping me get dressed for such big events. I told him that he's going to be my own bitch and he's going to come work for me! It would never happen, but a girl can dream, can't she!!!
My handsome date, Michael looked very sharp in his H. Boss. He's got the arms of an Olympic God. The guy is not only handsome, he's super nice. He was complimenting me the entire night. You know me, I love that shit!!
As we were dancing he kept giving me soft butterfly kisses on my neck and I loved the feeling of him breathing on him. 'JUST BREATH'! After the Champagne toast, which I had 2 glasses before because I was meeting his family in a not so formal way...It isn't like we're dating, but I was still nervous. His father was just as charming and has the same dazzling blue eyes. He asked for a dance and of course I accepted. How could I possibly turn down his father?! He was a real gentlemen, didn't try to touch me in akward places....and knew how to lead! He dipped really well for a man his age!
Later as I was sitting on Michaels lap because I caught the stupid bouquet that I didn't even want to participate in, Michael caught the ever so trashy garter! The photographer insisted on a picture and just as he took the picture, Michael tickled me and my natural reaction was to bend over and the lousy photographer got a shot of me bending over exsposing my tomboyish boobs!!! Suprisingly the picture turned out nice, his brother Jason took the digital shot at the same time...I asked for a copy. I must admit, I don't think I have ever smiled so much in a long time.
The evening was great. I had a wonderful time. The dinner, the music, the wine, the entire wedding was great. I had fun.
And...I was shocked to learn that the bride never gave up the POOTIE! She was still a virgin! How nice, right?! What a real gift!
I had to call it a night earlier than expected because I have to judge a beauty pageant tommorrow.
Cinderella must sleep!


Muah!

Being a fashionista...

Is a lot of damn trouble! I woke up not 100% sure of my dress....This is what I was wearing...with diamond strapped mile-high stillettos that even wrap the calve.



But then...I wasn't sure I wanted to wear that....It's super cute and I got a great deal on it....So I've been looking @ Bebe and I saw this cute purple number. It's more conservative, but I think I like it! My hair would be completely different...I would wear it all down with my Tiffany earrings.....It's so hard being in love with fashion!

Here it is: http://www.bebe.com/Main/detailImage.jsp?src=http://a116.g.akamai.net/7/116/9613/infinite/www.bebe.com/media/Images/Products/92450-syr-l_7c8b1.jpg


It's too late to vote!

I woke up early for my morning run and there is something alluringly sexy about sweat & morning dew between your tits at 7:30 a.m!

I have a mani/pedi appt @ 9....I got to jet.

My date is Michael...young, 24 yr oldf friend...he's actually in the wedding, it's his brothers wedding!

Have a great day my Fashion whores and Metrosexuals!!!

Muah!!!

News: My girl Katie is out in Louisana helping out with the relief efforts. Isn't that sweet?
I tried to get the good dr. to head down there...he doesn't want to. Pampered bitch!

Calendar for September:
Wedding on the 17th
Baby shower on the 18th, Judging a beauty pageant on the 18th
A visit to Martha's Vineyard 23rd
A weekend in Vegas with T :)
Baby Shower

October:
Work, WORK, W O R K

November:
Road trip with Becca, Haven, Trish, & Faith!

If you want us to make a stop in your area email either one of us and let us know--It's ON!!!

I fell in love with an Aussie today :) His accent made me wet.

I can't get what my friend Catherine said to me on Saturday night at Sean's party
...
We were discussing her having sex with the new flavor of the month. She said "I was too much for him. He told me that I was killing him. And Maya I was on my period a bit". Me to Cat--"That only makes the sex better". And how true is that?!!! OHHHHHHHHHHH VERY!

Speaking of which, I'm so horny! Time to rub one out ;)

I start running tonight...wish me luck!!!! It's been an entire season since I last excercised. No worries I'll be back to good in no time at all.

This is for you

"I Don't Know You Anymore"

I would like to visit you for a while
Get away and out of this city
Maybe I shouldn't have called but someone had to be the first to break
We can go sit on your back porch
Relax Talk about anything
It don't matterI'll be courageous if you can pretend that you've forgiven me
Because I don't know you anymore
I don't recognize this place
The picture frames have changed and so has your name
We don't talk much anymore
We keep running from the pain
But what I wouldn't give to see your face again
Spring time in the city
Always such relief from the winter freeze
The snow was more lonely than cold
If you know what I mean
Everyone's got an agenda, don't stop
Keep that chin up, you'll be all right
Can you believe what a year it's been
Are you still the same?
Has your opinion changed?'
Cause I don't know you anymore
I don't recognize this place
The picture frames have changed and so has your name
We don't talk much anymore
We keep running from these sentences
But what I wouldn't give to see your face again
I know I let you down
Again and again
I know I never really treated you right
I've paid the price
I'm still paying for it every day
So maybe I shouldn't have called
Was it too soon to tell?
Oh what the hell
It doesn't really matter
How do you redefine something that never really had a name?
Has your opinion changed?
Because I don't know you anymore
I don't recognize this place
The picture frames have changed and so has your name
We don't talk much anymore
We keep running from the pain
But what I wouldn't give to see your face again
I see your face.

The Meaning Behind Your Name

I found this to be accurate:

Amaya:
Very intelligent, broadminded and a good listener. You are an ideas person, with a wonderful creative imagination who is always seeking practical applications to apply this to. Your intelligence means that you have great potential for business success if you can apply some discipline and caution. You enjoy sensual pleasures and with a natural restless nature and liking for adventure life is rarely dull with you around.

The Make-out Bandit Strikes Again!

We started drinking and BBQ for Shawn's birthday @ 5pm. I was playing bartender and I can make a mean Pina Coloda...spelling is off but who gives a shit.

I'm tired and I'm sleepy and I am going to bed. But first I have to tell ya that Mikc, my boy, my friend who goes shopping with me all the tiime...he kept hanging out with me all evening so I had to lay it on him....I'm so bad.

The doctor wants to take me to Martha's Vineyard in 2 weeks...it's on baby!!! He's cool.

I pushed Michelle down tonight...she was being stupid and everyone knows I don't tolerate stupidity...I know my behaviour was sophomoric, but I can only take so much her trying to tell me to not drink.

Noah told me that he wants to have babies...I told him that surgery is going to cost him lots and I could recommend a good Dr!!!

Kenny--I didn't get back to you the other night because I was busy shopping with my girls and you know how we do! Trish told the Manager in Victoria's Secret that I was shopping for Angelina Jolie & I was her stylist and she told her that we wanted to shop without anyone in the store...would you believe those idiots believed that slut?!!! That has to be the funniest shit that she's pulled in a long time. We did some damage...I tried to explained to Trish that Angelina Jolie is not one to wear much lingerie...I could be wrong!!!

I'm feeling like I'm going upchuck again...I shouldn't mix Coconut rum with Beer...

It's midnight...I'm going to bed!!!

Catching Up

My new computer is awesome...love the laptop. Sooooooooo nice.

Me & My girls are headed out to my alumni meeting for cocktails and dinner. It will be lots of fun. Sorority sistas! Hey Sista, go lista, let me see ya flow sista! Always a cheerleader, I am

Grant is helping me plan my party....Yep thats right...I'm having a Luau! I'm getting everything together as you read this. If you're reading this, this means that you're probably invited.

Oh and T---Eric called my cell, we talked for 56 mins!!!

Mom & I

I have to admit my mother and I haven't always been the best of friends...we have issues. We don't see eye to eye on a lot of things. We discussed a lot of my problems lastnight, my incident in May, the many obstacles that I've overcame and before we ended our nearly 2 hour conversation she told me that I inspire her because I'm so strong. For her to tell me that meant a lot. I feel like the weakest link at times. I feel like I've dealt with a lot that most people my age never see. I think it opened a window for my mother and I. This morning I checked my email and she had already sent me the following:

Amaya baby I very much enjoyed the heart to heart that you and I had. I know that you are not perfect and you have some imperfections which makes you my Amaya. I love your strength, your wisdom and your inner and outer beauty radiate in everything that you do. It shows in your dedication to the family with your job! I'm humbled at times because you are to me, just perfect like the rest of my babies. You are all flawless. Your father and I will always be a part of your support group. We are always just a phone call or drive away. Make sure you eat your carbs baby. You can not function with out them. Here is the piece that I was telling you about last night. Read it and obey it. My orders!

Mommy

Everything Happens for a Reason...
Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there...
to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or help figure out who you are or who you want to become.
You never know who these people may be but you lock eyes with them, you know that very momentthat they will affect your life in some profound way.

And sometimes things happen to you at the time that may seem horrible,painful and unfair, but in reflection you realize that without overcoming those obstacles you would never realize your potential, strength, will poweror heart.

Everything happens for a reason.
Nothing happens by chance or by means of luck. Illness, love, lost moments of true greatness and sheer stupidity all occur to test limits of your soul.
Without these small tests, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight,flat road to nowhere safe and comfortable but dull and utterly pointless.

The people you meet affect your life. The successes and downfalls that you experience can create whom you are, and the bad experiences can be learned from.
In fact they are probably the most poignant and important ones.
If someone hurts you, betrays you or breaks your heart, forgive them because they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious to whom you open your heart.
If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but also because they are teaching you to love and open your heartand eyes to little things.
Make every day count.
Appreciate everything thatyou possibly can, for you may never experience it again.
Talk to people whom you have never talked to before, and actually listen.
Let yourself fall in love, break free and set your sights high.
Hold yourhead up because you have every right to.
Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself, no one else will believe in you.
Create your own life and then go out and live it.

So fresh & So Clean

I just realized by looking at the clock that it takes me a while in the a.m. to get dressed and ready to go. No surprise really. I typically awake in the early morning hours with the roosters just to get a start on the day. I normally wake up @ 5 a.m, brush my teeth, shower, apply moisturizer (Lancome Idealist or Kiehls) and spf to my face, I always grab the warmest towel from the towel warmer for my body and you must have one for the hair as well! I throw lastnites panties & tee shirt down the laundry chute and I try to iron my clothes...I haven't really succeeded at this skill, yet. It's time consuming and I hate it when I come home and I have another huge iron shape to the ironing board. I hate hearing Olga's mouth afterwards..."YOU PAY NO ATTENTION, YOU SING TOO MUCH THIS A.M AND YOU BURNT THE HOUSE DOWN" Funny thing is...the house is still standing!!! And usually I let her know that thats the reason I have her here!

I've been cooking sometimes in the mornings too. I'm perfecting my omelette. It's going to be on menus everywhere one day! I drink Crystal light. And i'm obsessing about the Crystal Light on the go packets--I have them stashed everywhere, in my bag, in my desk, at the restuarant, at Mom's--I love it. I think I should probably buy stock in Kraft....It helps when I have to drink 101 oz's of h20 a day, it gives water flava!

I'm always at work early and I love the smell of coffee brewing although I refuse to drink my own coffee or anything that 50 random people that you catch picking their nose, rearranging their 'boys' or pulling a wedgie out of their ass touch...I know thats gross but I have to be real here. You wouldn't drink it either.

So the point of this is that I awoke at 5 am to pack because I kept putting it off and when T called lastnight I couldn't stay focused so I had to quit..in other words, I got lazy!

I'm supposed to meet everyone @ 10 am @ my favorite coffeeshop on Main, I'm still sitting here wrapped in a towel hopeing that my hair will just air dry....I wanted to wear my "GEEK UNDERCOVER" shirt, KENNY!!! COUGH COUGH, but I'm wearing some distressed jeans and a teeshirt with my oversized sunglasses (Think MaryKate Olsen) and a hair wrap with my hair in a ponytail, and some gold sequins flip flops, Super casual..just the way I like it!

We're spending the last weekend of summer 05 in NC.....And I NEED this!!!! I can't wait to see everyone and go nuts!

I'll have to recap my weekend for everyone when I return on Monday! Have a good weekend people!!!

Muah, Muah, Muah!!!

Whats new in Amaya's world....

*NO SOCIAL LIFE SINCE THE CLINTON ADMINISTRATION
-So I'm a little dramatic, but...I've been out of commission for too long!
-Kudos to Valium, Flexoral, & Darvocets! Yeah!!!
*NO SUMMER VACATION TO DATE :(
-It got postponed because I bent over at my waist without bending with my knees to strap my heel.
-Kudos because Grant says that I bent over in the sexiest way possible!!!
*MY NEW CELL SUCKED
-Razor was haute but if I can't use it in my house I don't need it.
-Kudos because I was asked out by the Preppy Alex.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I recently got some horrible news about my girl, my fellow cheerleader, my shorty girl--{Miss Georgianna if you're nasty!!! We lovedJanet's NASTY BOYS} She is living in LA with her father now and was recently diagnosed with Mouth Cancer! Gigi is only 25! Her mother and I talk on a weekly basis now.....And the sad part of all of this horrible ordeal is that Gigi will be disfigured. Dr's are taking out her right jawbone and half of her tongue will be removed. It's a lot to deal with. And she's doing great. I just want everyone to think of her in your thoughts as you go through your day and come across a problem....Just remember Gigi. And remember that it can always be worse. We're all guilty of taking our health for granted. Just remember her and lets keep her in your prayers. She's my girl and I can't lose another!!!

My Little Reecee turned one

My little Reecee turned One!

Reece turned 1 on Sunday! His birthday was celebrated on Saturday. He got his first haircut too! He had the Albert Einstein look going on and it was bad!

Kurt was in town and it was so nice to see him and hang out with him again. He's probably one of the sweetest guys I know. Except the part where he practically broke my arm and on Sunday I looked like a battered wife! I bruise easily anyway. We get along well. He's nothing like Renee--THANK GOD! As Mike called her--Ghetto bitch!

Take a look at Mike's kid...He's improved tremendously! He's a sweetheart.

We Belong Together

I've always been in love with Mariah and sometimes her lyrics really hit home.

I was stupid. I was foolish. I was lying to myself.
I didn't know you, I didn't know me and I thought I knew everything!
Who else am I going to lean on when times get rough?
Whose going to talk to me on the phone til the sun comes up?
Whose going to take your place? There ain't nobody better!

Hi!

It's Been a While!

I've just found the time to update this. The fan club was harassing me!

So T & my girl Katie are going to hook up! Yay!

Dr Drew may be going to Arizona for his fellowship.
Kenny is making big bank!

Driving

Dear 4 way stop between Beech street and Summit Avenue:

Fool Me Once ......Shame on You

Fool me 47 times......Shame on the Commonwealth of VA for licensing me.


I can't drive well,

A

Taking back my Life

Too much has been going on lately which is why I haven't had the time to update nor have I really had any desire to. The trial is soon and I can't wait to just get it over with!!! I'm going to Vegas soon and one of my 'friends' has proposed...I guess thats what that was!!! We've been friends for a looong time and we're going to do something crazy and see where it takes us!!!

"Through you (you know who you are) I've learned to smile again. You've opened the path to happiness! Your love's amazing. Lying beside me you see into the soul of me and your spirit sets me free!"

And to everyone who got a drunk dial on Friday...I'm sorry :)

Oh and "BrokeAss" (he reads this, he knows what I call him!) and I have been cordial to each other. He called out of nowhere and we've been talking since. Turns out Dirty Diesel B is a maniputive Polynesian little cunt. Mike set the record straight for me. How could I be so retarded as to trust her?! He says that she's still crazy jealous. Big Shocker.

Isaiah is the best ball player ever! He scored the winning hit for the Padres last night. He is the man. Derek, take notice!!! And did I mention that he's also the brightest child I know?! He bought a gerbil from the pet store and I was trying to get info from Isaiah about the nasty thing and when I asked what exactly it was he broke it down for me "It's a Gerbil, I named him Tanner because he's tan and white. He's about 8 weeks old and he belongs to the rodent family, they have a negative reputation in the heterosexality community". I was shocked. The kid is only 8 years old! When I asked how he knew that he said "Research Mini" He's beyond brilliant!

Upcoming events:
NEW YORK CITY :) Can't wait to see ya :)
VEGAS :) We're doing this in June
CHICAGO :) Mike is going nuts!!!

Memorial Day weekend plans are still up in the air. Any ideas? Email 'em.

I have to get back to work!

OH and Issaac--Don't REINLIST :( :(

I slept so well lastnight. It was a much needed night of sleep. I haven't slept well in weeks and this was great for me. I awoke to a call from 'Married Mike'--the ex. He wants to do lunch in G'town today but I declined. I took the day to spend it in my pajamas and enjoy my house all to myself and pay bills, and plant flowers...yes, I do that!!!

Brit and talked lastnight. Why? I don't know! The only thing we have in common is Michael aka 'Brokeass' she seems to be doing well. Unfortunately, he isn't. I was thinking of calling him just to check in on him. She said that he's gone "GOTH PUNK" and wears eyeliner these days!!! Not the guy that I knew a year ago!!! Honestly I don't think I really knew him though...It's weird how Brit and I talk. We're okay with each other. Never in a million years would have thought that I'd be cordial to her. Who knew?!

My birthday is quickly approaching and I've had demands from everywhere to spend it with me. I promised dinner with Charles--aka Mr. Millionaire, his birthday is tommorrow. Dr. Drew Chang wants to hang out too. He's so different from anything ordinary. He's a nice change. My friend Jeff (law school) is coming up soon from FL and we're going to hang out for a few....My boy Kenny in Long Island and I are going to hang out when I get to NYC on May 12th. But I think I'm taking my girls to the beach house with me. We all need that. No men, just lots of good drinks and some sun and we'll be happy!!!

Did I mention that I love my new job? I'm so happy! Did I tell you how much I miss my Reece? Did I mention how much I'm not liking Renee these days?!

I'm missing E a lot.

Then theres T! He's going through a funk with the girls...The wedding pics were great!!! He's so increadibly goodlooking and I think we should just give up on love and just move in with each other :) On a more serious note I think of an old Otis Redding song when I think of T and Ellen


"Try a little tenderness, thats all you have to do. It's not just sentimental, NO NO NO. You won't regret it, no no no...Them young girls they don't forget it, no no....It's all so easy, all you have to do is try try a lil tenderness...all you have to do is dance...hold her where you want her, squeeze her, don't tease her, never leave her, you've got to hold her....try a little tenderness...you have to love her, please her...don't bruise her...NO NO NO!!! Try a lil tenderness! "

I've got work to do now....

Enjoy the lovely weather!!!

Bad Habit

My friends insist that I give up on the 'internet guy' that disrespects me so much, but it's hard to just forget about him. He wasn't just some random guy...he was much more, but I can't change that. Have you ever loved somebody so much that you went againist the right thing that you should do? Ugh...what am I doing....enough, enough!

Faith came to my office this morning...As soon as she walked in I just looked at her and asked what was wrong and she said just started crying. As I got closer to her to comfort her, there was blood all over her clothes and I freaked! I thought she was in a car accident or something horrible like that....Her psuedo husband beat the shit out of her! She had marks all over her face where she said that he punched her right between the eyes, the marks on her upper arm was from his nails digging into her skin. I listened to her and all I heard was how everything was her fault....I don't agree with the way that Faith lives her life, but there is never a reason for a man to hit you, ever!!!! After talking about it most of the day with her she wasn't seeing things as they were...Needless to say she went back to him after I begged her to stay with me and I would help her as much as possible to make it on her own....It was all for nothing. I've tried calling her house two times tonight without an answer. I'm worried about her but I'm going to keep the faith!!

Work is great. I love it. I am so happy. And against my mother's wishes I'm not going back to school to get a degree in travel and tourism. How often would you find me working 40 plus hours a week? NEVER!!!

My 'ex' friend Jeff from FL whose ex is miss Patty Dunn who was shunned and lost her pageant title because she posed partially nude wants to spend my birthday with me and tells me all the time how I'm better than most and 'he' didn't appreciate me. Jeff doesn't know everything though....

Daddy is doing well. Im so happy. He actually told me that he feels as if he can breath again!!! Love my daddy!

Tonight Michael, Mark, Jason, Trish, Stacy, Courtney, Ian and I hung out at the bar and got a lil buzzed. It was nice....

I met a guy a work who is actually cute, Breck. He's so sweet. I'm sure he's devious beyond all of that.

In other news, ghetto fabulous Renee is punishing me by not allowing me to see Reece. I cry everytime I have enough time to think about him. I love him so much and she's keeping him away from me even after I put my life on hold for her for too long. I've been there for her more than her entire family has and because I decided that I couldn't keep doing that, I had to get back to the real world and get a real job she got pissed. Reece knows that I love him. He won't forget that. Ever. He knows that I took care of him. He knows that I was the one that was there for him thru everything...fevers, sickness, his daddy's death....his first word, his first step...everything! And she is now punishing me. So Renee if you ever stumble upon this...FUCK YOU :)

Back to the Merlot I go!

Tonight was just all wrong!

So the girls and had the evening planned out...we were getting a suite, meeting up with some friends and partying. The evening started out fabulously. We were ahead of our arrival time, (always good for high maintaince girls). We checked into our room and it was very luxurious and nice. We all started the evening off with some Bacardi and then we headed over to dinner @ The Piccolo. My new favorite Italian rest. All the boys ordered prime rib while I was normal and had Ziti. It was very pleasing...the service, food and the environment was cozy, quaint and we were all pleased (thats rare).

We went out to Ozio, then to 1223, then to Home. I'm 25 years old and the bar scene is just not for me anymore. Thats not news though. I met a fighfighter named Bryce who was super sweet but he was from IL. Like I need another one of those....Too much work!!!! He insisted on buying me drinks...who am I to say no?! After two Candy Apple 'Tini's I was becoming disgusted with the 'game' that men tend to run in order to 'get some'! I'm not that easy asshole is what I was silently screaming while flashing my 2000 watt Miss Congenality smile.

We all went back to our hotel room and then I had an ephiphany. This entire scene with the boy girl ratio at 2-1 just wasn't good. I flet uncomfortable and then when the guys broke out the 'snow' I got uneasy and I freaked...I demanded that everyone get it out of my site. That drug caused soooooooooo much pain in my life. I'm not sure I'll ever get over it. So after realizing that I was better than that....I decided that I was going home...Okay...really....McLean!!! I don't trust myself around it and I don't want it around me. So I left. Yep....drove home alone.

I needed to.


More later :)

My Rock

Thats what he is....

I've said it before but I don't know what I'd do if I lost him...he's the glue that keeps me together. He's the only man that has ever loved me unconditionally and he's not doing well and I live in constant fear of losing that and God forbid if I ever did....

I want my husband to be like my daddy
There is noone else like my daddy
I still remember the expression on your face when you found out that I'd been on a date and had a boyfriend...
I still remember I called you crying about my tattoo you could have said I told you so instead you said you'd get one too!
Words can't express my boundless gratitude for you
I appreciate what you do...
You've given me such security, no matter what mistakes I make I know you're there for me
You cure my disapointments and heal my pain, you understand my fears and you protect me
I treasure every extraordinary memory...
I thank you for loving me
Even if my man broke my heart today,
No matter how much pain I'm in,
I'll be okay because I got a man in my life that can't be replaced
Because this love is unconditional and it doesn't go away...
Lord why did you pick me? I can't stop the tears from falling...
I love you soooooooooooo much daddy! You've done so much for me. I love you daddy
I get so emotional daddy...I get so emotional daddy everytime I think of you, I get so emotional
There is noone else like my daddy...No One else...

He's been thru hell and he needs all the prayers he can get...

It's been shitty around here but I'll live...

Andrew aka Dr. Chang and I are going to chill tonight...I need some distractions. I don't know it may be too soon...we'll see.

Work today was great. Loved every minute of it...I'm excited. Although Golf is down 8% this year...but with me on board, that will change....

It's time for a new car...yay!!! Shopping always makes me happy. I'm going downtown for some drinks...whose coming with?

So much in so little time...

Has happened! My dad is still not in the best of health since the heartattack, but I have full faith that he'll make a full recovery if Dr. Chang has anything to do with it!

My aunt died a week ago today...so unexpected. I think this is number 8. I haven't spoken with her since Chandler's birthday in January... Her husband left her for another woman last year and her sons said that she never fully got over that...She died with a broken heart! And can you believe her husband didn't even show at the service??? I guess he feels guilty.

Not much going on except some guy, "GARY" called Eric and mentioned my name. Eric finds this very odd and has questioned me about it several times. I called the number, I don't know that guy's voice thats on the voicemail. I don't even know the number. And yet he finds it too odd. Naturally it pisses me off that he keeps bringing it up. I'm going to call the number today and talk with 'GARY'. I do know a GARY, and he was crazy...He moved to NJ though and got a life. So who this person is, I don't know....And Eric can go fuck himself.

I've been going to the tanning bed getting my tan on...I can't wait for summer!

Im battling a cold....NOT GOOD.

Oh and there is a new member of the family, diaper posse...Little Elijah Christian :)

PEACE, LOVE, and INFERTILITY!

NO JUSTICE I TELL YOU

You always hope that the people who were cruel to you/cocky/perfect/higher than thou in high school will ultimately fail at life because it really wouldn't be fair any other way, right? So, I'm thinking I'm doing pretty good. Got away to college, only gained about 10 lbs. Joined a sorority, got involved. Double majored. Working hard, sometimes....Well on Saturday I ran into an old friend from High School Brennon Wilson! The conversation went like this.

Brennon: "Yeah, I ran into (insert name of perfect bitch you hated in highschool here) today."

Amaya: "Yeah, really? Is she fat yet?"

Brennon: Uh, actually no. She's in amazing shape. She's training to run the NYC Marathon. She runs like, 8 miles a day."

Amaya: (Silence)"..... oh."

Brennon: And she's president of her company."

Amaya: (Silence) "....I see."

Brennon: "Oh yeah, and she's got an interview with Northwestern to study nuclear medicine."

Amaya: "ARE YOU FUCKING SHITTING ME? Who studies 'nuclear medicine?' That chick is as dumb as a box of rocks."

Brennon: "Well I guess not. Oh yeah, and remember her friend (insert name of perfect bitch you hated's slightly chunky sidekick you once referred to in jest as 'tank ass')? Well she's lost 35 lbs and looks GREAT!"

Amaya: UGhhhhhh"

TOTALLY NOT WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR!!!! I was really hoping they'd all be trailer trash by now.

Dammit.

Okay, I know, I know it's petty. I really wish her no ill will. (Okay, a lil ill will) but the dumb bitchy girls in high school aren't supposed to become marathon-running nuclear physisists. They're supposed to be fat and getting smacked around by some guy named Duke in a trailer in your hometown. And everyone she kicked around is supposed to be rejoicing!

All of this brought to mind the movie Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion. My 5 year is only 1 year away. Fawk! I'd better start training for the Olympics if I want to compete!

Okay. I'm done.

 

I'll call him Grizzly Lips....

How do I get him to stop?

Because I'm such a nice chic and sometimes I talk to Married Mike I allowed him to email me pictures of his kid. ONCE. He won't stop. Not only is it taking up valuable space in my hotmail account but the kid is no Reece. BY ANY MEANS!!! To put it nicely, the kid is not cute! Most people would think that I was jealous and I was being mean, but judge for yourself! Check out the funky nose on that kid! Those lips are pretty crazy too! I'm sure he's sweet, but cute...he's got nothing. Poor kid.

This is the email I wrote to Michael:

Dear Married Asian Man with the funky lipped baby with Cha-Cha,

I'm sure you find your offspring adoreable, however most of us with the latest Anne Klein eyewear don't! Stop torturing me with the pictures. One was too many.

Best Wishes to you and your munchkins,

The Always Beautiful,
Amaya W.


Okay--so I didn't send it, I wanted to! I just said thats enough of the pics. I have 17 now of this thing. What to do with them....Delete... Disk Cleanup....Reboot. Done!

I'm eating a ton of icecream and loving it. It makes me feel better.

Does anyone love me? Why don't you ever email me then????

Love,
Amaya

Oh No! Snow!

A pretty blanket of snow has just fallen. Making the roadways horrible. I don't mind though, I like a little excitement once in a while :)

As you're all aware of by now, the Oscars were on last night and as usual there were no surprises of who the winners were. Jamie Foxx took home best actor and ugly Hilary Skank won best Actress. I have to admit she is a good actress, but she's FUGLY! Her dress was haute.. I liked it. Although her hair could have been better. The entire night was black tie & sass. I thought everyone looked nice. Except Renee Zellwegger. Eric says that she always looks like she's drunk--too funny! I, on the other hand, I like her. Ugly or not! We all can't be Halle Berry's!

Saki, Sushi, Saki to me! Saturday night was quite an experience. Faith, Trish, Becca and I all went out for sushi and then headed over to get our gambling on. FUN TIMES FOLLOWED.

More details later!

My little Reecee Cup At Christmas

A Dead End

Sometimes I feel as if I have no control over my life. As you all know I seem to have a lot of bad karma. I attribute that to sleeping with a married man, knowingly. And enjoying it at that time, I might add.

Today, I'm 25, I consider myself attractive. I'm intelligent, and I try to see the best in everyone to a fault. I was taught from a young age to respect everyone! Yes, even married misleading lying cheating scummy men. My grandfather Teddy always told me that there isn't such a thing as different races. There's only race and thats the human race. We are to treat everyone the same because if we don't it would come back and smack us on the ass even harder! And being the wise old man that he is thats the one lesson that I've learned hard this week.

Having a lot of free time on my hands this past week I began to dwelve deep inside of myself and it brought a lot of things to my attention. I'm lost. I have no direction in my life. I've held on to the past for far too many years. I don't feel like I've accomplished much. I graduated from a well respected school only to become a teacher. Today I work for an art gallery doing sales! How wrong is that? I do well financially. It's the same story though--it's not fullfilling and I'm longing to be fullfilled. Thats what I've always wanted. I just want the feeling of accomplishment. Thats why I have no dirty dishes in my kitchen. Thats why you see me scrubbing every glass after someone uses it. Thats why I never have laundry to do. Because the feeling of accomplishment is so damn sweet. Thats all I want. I want to be proud of myself and I'm not.

I feel as if I've stopped growing. I don't feel as if I'm living. I shop. I spend time with my family. I'm single. I don't have sex like I should. I believe it's time for me to fix myself.

I can't live like this. I've decided that I won't. He's been doing him, now it's time I do me.

When you've done all you could but was misunderstood theres no feeling like being free. It's best I do whats best for me. I've been there I've done that and there is no looking back. My mind is made up and my heart is in the right place.
Finally I'm looking out for me.

Can I get some loving? Can I get some time?

Back to frying my brain with hollywood-style fairytales. You know the kind where everyone lives happily ever after. Such bullshit. But it fullfills me for the time being.

At the Fan club's request

I am updating my journal. I apologize for not returning calls when I say I will. I apologize for being anti-social. I'm doing as much as I can considering the circumstances.

My friends basically held a gun to my head and made me get DSL, what a waste. My dial-up was just as good. I'm paying a lot more money every month for this and I don't see a huge difference! Call me crazy.

I really don't feel like sitting here and typing....blah! I'll update later.

At the Fan club's request

I am updating my journal. I apologize for not returning calls when I say I will. I apologize for being anti-social. I'm doing as much as I can considering the circumstances.

My friends basically held a gun to my head and made me get DSL, what a waste. My dial-up was just as good. I'm paying a lot more money every month for this and I don't see a huge difference! Call me crazy.

I really don't feel like sitting here and typing....blah! I'll update later.

Its Clearly Time to Move On

Enough said. I won't be mentioning his name anymore and their won't be anymore reference to that womanizing pig. I can't believe he's meeting up with GIRLS while here. Am I stupid? Not a phone call from him yet. A text message that says that he didn't get my message until late lastnight. He was busy. GOOD ONE. FUCKER. No matter where he is, who he's with, he's always too busy for me. I'm so done. PUKE!

Dear God

Please tell me why I even bother. Please give me the strength to realize that this guy truly is a freaking jerk! Please help me stay away from him. I don't need him in my life so please help me to stop trying to contact him!!! Please. I was once this girl with pride that would never call a guy. Where the hell is she??? He makes me weak, but you can make me strong and I'm putting all of this in YOUR hands.

Amaya


So Eric is in town with his boys and I've tried contacting him now not once, twice, four, but 6 or more times! He doesn't answer his phone and he doesn't call me back. I got the hint but everytime I think about it, it pisses me off. I want to just go to his hotel room and slap his face. FUCK. Does he know who the fuck I am? And why I bother, I don't know. I think I need a wake up call. He's not accpeting my calls nor is he responding to text messages. Am I really this desperate? For God's sake, he fucked me over. Why am I stressing and why am I begging for an invite from him to just hang out and say hi? I'm making myself upset by trying too hard. I know that he's a jerk and God forbid I should ever talk to him again. I'm going back to the hospital. Perhaps I'll make myself available tonight. NO. FUCK NO I WON"T. This guy has been a complete waste of my time and look at me, I don't think i've batted my eyelashes this much in forever!!!!! Stress! I'm giving up on men. Back to see my brother.

::**MEN**:: is there anything else?

Eric and I have been done for nearly two weeks now. Being the too kind person that I am, I contacted him via email and phone to see if he basically needed any help getting around in unfamiliar territory. Afterall he's bringing all of his boys now and yes, we know the woman loving man is bringing girls too! I swallowed my pride and called him. What the fuck is wrong with me. I've left two messages. I must be crazy. Or just a glutton for punishment. I guess it's time I just move on. With that said...

I do have more important things to vent about...starting with my brother. He went to physical therapy on Tuesday and they sent him to get a sonagram right away because of a swollen, red, warm to the touch knot on his knee. They confirmed what his therapist feared, he had a blood clot! He was admitted and by Wednesday evening the clot had moved from his knee to his thigh and this morning it was still in his abdomen which is DANGEROUS. Dr's are worried. He's on blood thinners and he can't even move. He can't shower, my mother has to give him a sponge bath and he can't get angry or excited at anything. He's in good spirits and says that everything is fine....And IT BETTER BE! This morning my dad went into surgery. My brother isn't aware though because it could make him upset....Worried even. So I have to go and stay with my brother while Mom and Becca and Haven and Jordan all rotate hospitals. This is too much shit to deal with. I think I'm taking the next shuttle to the nearest planet!!!

I've decided that it's time for a change. I'm never happy in one setting for long anyway. I'm thinking of purchasing a new house in the Great Falls area of NOVA. I'm looking at a 4 bedroom, 4 bathroom on a golf course. It's absolutely breathtaking. I've been thinking about chopping off the hair again...what do you think? Just shoulder length. Nothing TOO drastic. It would be a great length by the time summer gets here and it's time for a change. You'd think I was running for an office. I'll quit.

So Eric and the boys are in town tonight. Should be fun for them. In my email I told him some places he should go. Hopefully he'll trust me. I wouldn't lead astray.

Married Mike keeps calling my cell. He's must sense that I'm fucking vulrenable as all hell. He knows me too well. He's always had a sick six sense when it came to me. He always knew. I think it's about time I change my phone numbers. I have to sever ties and if I cut out communication it would be a good start!!!

Look at me. This entire post has been about the men! Most have betrayed me. I guess I'll just continue loving my brothers and my father. I know they'll never hurt me, only protect me.

Eric, if you read this....I have tried calling you 4 times now, even leaving messages and emails. I guess you're too busy!!! Ha ha. Point taken. So I'm writing you off right now. I don't want anymore emails about how much you love me and we could make things work....I've tried too many times. Best of luck.


Amaya

La La

Has anyone heard Ciara & Missy's '1,2 step'? I'm predicting that it's going to be all over the club scene. It's hot. "Goodies" was hot too. Ciara has staying power.

Songs I'm loving at the moment:

1.True by Ryan Cabera--Reminds me of SOMEONE SPECIAL :)
2.Only U by Ashanti
3.Soldier by Destiny's CHild--Issaac of course
4.My Perogative by Britney--My friends tell me it's my song after our road trip! Funny!
5.Fuck It (I don't want you back) by Eamon--Reminds me of a certain loser
6.Let Me Love You by Mario--T loves it too!

Of course Madonna is my muse, inspiration and my favorite chic of all time. In high school I was running for Vice President of my junior class and my cheerleading squad performed with me and we did a skit with 'Vogue' and re wrote the song and changed it to 'Vote! I'm going to find the lyrics that we used. Needless to say I won :) During week long try-outs and camps @ UVA during our last audition in order and it was down to cutting time, I chose to do Madonna's version of 'American Pie' at that time the movie American Pie was popular and so was Madonna's song and I thought that I symbolized American Pie!!! And yet again, I made the cut! So Madonna has always been good to me! Love her. Not to mention that American Pie is the only song I know all the lyrics to!


In other news, I didn't go into work today, however I do have a lunch meeting at noon that I will be going to, {COUGH BIG CLIENT COUGH!} All is well, Daddy should be coming home today. I spoke to him this morning and he's tired and wants to get out!! I want him home STAT!!!


I'm in the mood to paint so I'm doing some art work for Reece :)

Later :)

P.S. You should all go and listen to my music suggestions--they're awesome!!!

A Big Wake UP

My plans for the weekend which included a ski trip with my parents to celebrate Chan's 5th Birthday was turned upside down on Friday night when my father had yet another heart attack!

After spending 3 nights in the hospital so far he will likely be able to come home on Tuesday if all goes well. He has to prepare for yet another surgery. I feel so bad for the guy. It's so scary, the thought of losing my daddy. Wow. Just wow. On a brighter note, he is improving. I don't understand why this keeps happening because he's fit, he eats healthy and he's young. Too young for any of this crap.

Today, I'm going to do some work here for a while and then I'm going to the hospital to see him.

Adam broke up with Heather. And says that she's a dirty whore. He also said that no matter who he dates theres always me who he can't forget. He told me that he is still in love with me. I just told him I think he's lonely at the moment and in a few weeks he'll meet someone else who he'll fall in love with. He offered to come be with me when I called him out of desperation on Saturday night. I was so furious with Eric who had plans and couldn't comfort me after everything I was going through. I guess I just expect too much from people. If you know me at all you know I'm the person who drops everything, including their own job to help and comfort someone. Obviously, not everyone is like me. I don't know what to think. He really disappointed me. I realize that he had plans, but I needed to talk to somebody after spending the entire night and day at the hospital, but I wasn't entertaining enough with all of my tears. So I called Adam who talked to me until I fell asleep.

It will get better, I'm sure.

Another Year Over

...And a new one's has begun on a great note at that! I've made some serious new year resolutions that I've kept graciously thus far. Considering that today is only day three! I'll let you know how it goes.

A Sneak Peek:
-Excercising 5-6 times per week
-No fast food/take out atleast during the month of January
-No alcohol until my birthday
-I intend on reading atleast 1 book every 6 weeks
-Travel more--Chicago a lot ;)

I woke up @ 5 a.m. this morning and went to the gym and was that place busy. It'll settle down in another 2 weeks after everyone starts to lose their motivation. Today is Daniel's funereal. I'll be there.

My accounting class is from 5:30 until 9:00 so I'll be nice and tired tonight! I'll get plenty of sleep. Yay!

I have tons of folders on my desk, I'm assuming thats a sign for my happy butt to get to work...sooooooooooo happy to be back!

Happy New Year!

Amaya

It's been a while

And as fabulous as a life I live, nothing much has changed. I still spend too much money and I am sexually deprived. No news.

I'm preparing for my weekend adventure with all 11 of us heading to the big city. I'm stoked.

My mom continues to give me shit about my moral values and my priorities. Again, not much has changed.

Isaiah won All state in his Creative Learning Competition. He took home a huge trophy and a $50 savings bond...what can I say, he's a Warner :) Well, part anyway.

My workout this morning was intense. I did a full body conditioning, spent 2 hours. I have to prepare for the weekend you know...and being on my sabbatical made my ass gain weight. My real goal is to get back to running. SLOWLY I will. I can't wait to hit the pavement again...Except not by a freaking car, this time!!!

I got phone calls to make and then I have to get to my morning meeting.

Lots of love :)

Miss Thang

So, you missed me?

I love the feeling of accomplishment. I've missed out on a lot of work during my 3 month sabbatical. It feels good, although I miss my little Reece a lot. I know he's doing well without me too.

Last night, Becca and I went Christmas shopping and I still have a ton of more gifts to buy for my too damn big family. Most of my aunts and uncles are getting Gift cards to restaurants or stores. I know it's not much thought put into it, but I think they're all boring by not knowing what they want for Christmas. Whereas the kids, they know what they want. Just ask Isaiah, He made copies of his letter to Santa and everytime someone asks what he wants he breaks his list out. He even left one on my fridge. He's too cute. Chandler & Isaiah are easy to buy for. Mathew, he's not so easy...his first birthday is on Saturday. I have no idea what to get him for his birthday :( He's only a year old...sheesh, me and my damn kid issues!

As for me, I have put together many lists, but have lost them all! I do like the new U2 Special Edition Ipod--it's haute. I love me some U2 too :)

T Man wants to see Les Mis this weekend. I don't think I can work it into my schedule. I have a lot going on this weekend. I'll have to make up for it.

Eric and I haven't been talking much at all. He's put a big wall between us. I'm not going to lose sleep over it though. Perhaps it's because he's sick and just doesn't want to discuss matters, which I understand too. I just wish I had some insight on whats going on. He's not giving me much these days. After the fight about THE CALL, I don't know if we can fix anything. I just know that if we spent some QT together, it will all work itself out, however he's in Chicago and I'm in VA. This is my reality.

I could write a book today, but I got tons going on here.

later :)

~ I don't feel well.
~ i Should have turned my cell phone off during the meeting.
~ I should have worn the Therma Care heat patch for my freakin knee because it's hurting like crazy. It's even stiff.
~ I keep seeing that stupid woman who was in my dream last night. She was stalking me and being really weird. How Blake-like. She freaked me out.
~ I should have slept better.
~ I shouldn't be nice to people who aren't nice to me even though I try hard to make them feel better.
~ I shouldn't allow petty things to bother me.

Back to work.

Back to Reality

My Monday started off well. I worked out until my knee killed me and then I went into the office and got some things squared away. Of course everyone was asking how my Maternity Leave went!! I roll my eyes of course and laugh it off, but gosh I miss Reece. His little smile is priceless. I didn't miss him this much last week, what gives?

Someone raided all the tampons from my desk and I have to go for a tampon run before Aunt Flow arrives. I'm guessing she'll be here by 8:00 p.m. That explains my serious horniness.

You guys remember Scott Schroder? The guy I was crushing on right after Broke-Ass, well turns out he 'is missing me' via text and last night he phoned to say that he really made a big mistake and hopes he could make it up to me. First off he knew about Eric, months ago. And I wanted him, back in the day because he kept my mind off of Michael. Not an easy task, he failed miserably. I didn't know what to say, so basically I avoided what he was saying by talkinb about myself profusely, big shocker.

And there's nothing better than a good looking guy, Charles, he asked me to dinner tonight in Manasses. I told him I'd have to get back with him on that. I don't know if it would be just a casual dinner together or if it would entail getting wasted and having sloppy sex! I'm going to bet on A :) He's cute. For sure. I still don't understand where guys always think that I should know that they're freaking Millionaires, I don't know where that stems from. I'm not a damn gold digger.

Actually yes I am, I have to make money so I have to finish up a proposal for Patricia Dune. Now back to work I go, mio!

O Yessssssssssssssssssssssssss

Sometimes a girl just has to get laid. After masturbating like a mad woman I was up to 7x's today. Healthy what?!

No real highlights. It was basically an uneventful weekend. Low key, just the way I like it.

Bed time now.

Feel better my V-Man

An Email from Michael L.

I spent my black friday shopping with some friends for a total of 15 hours or more. I just checked my email and saw this from Mike. No, not Brokeass or Married Mike, but my good friend Mike who is too cute and clever!! I've forwarded the email to everyone, but here it is again! (I fixed the spelling errors)

I never seen you looking as lovely as you did tonight, I've never seen you shine so bright. I never seen so many men ask for your number and looking for a little commission, give em half a chance, I've never seen that red Pea Coat your wearing or the highlights in your hair that catch your eyes, I have been blind. Lady in Red is shopping with me, hand in hand, theres too many people here, just me and you. It's where I want to be. I hardly know this beauty by my side, I'll never forget the way you look tonight at the sight of a sale. I've never seen you looking as gorgeous as you did tonight. You were amazing. I've never seen so many people that want to be there by your side and hold your bags as you turn in front of the mirror and strut those thighs away, you took my breath away, I've never felt a feeling of complete and utter love. Lady in Red is shopping with me, bags in hand.Theres too many people here, just me and Mya, It's where I want to be. I hardly know this beauty by my side, I'll never forget the way she looked tonight.

I found it to be cute :) Too bad we ditched the guys to go to other malls lastnight. I felt bad for a sec, then I got past it ;)

We spent most of the day at Tyson's Galleria I & II, then on to Fair Oaks. We didn't have anymore room in my trunk for all of our bags. Thank God for Discover's Cash back incentive!!!

I spent too much money, money that I didn't have, dammit!!! But as I always say I'm powerless against the allure of anything little, lacy and strappy!!! It's an addiction.

One of my many. I think I'm becoming obsessed with sex. I feel like I need it all the time. I think about it every minute and counting down! Not that I'm worried. I'm happy with my healthy libido. Now, time to get fucked :)

Actually, I'm going to spend the Saturday with my Mom and Becca & Haven. We're going shopping and then tonight is Isaiah's birthday party at the Cave. Isaiah and his friends are at that geeky, 8 year old stage where they want to explore and pretend they're scientists--Nerds. Then they're going to this specially made garden maze for the second grade nerds. According to Becca this is what Isaiah wanted. Suuuuuuure. Nerds!

So this Versace clad, pink ice bling bling sportin chic has to go change my pink Marc Jacobs bag to my new lil Fendi clutch. Yuuuuummmmy.

Miss me, folks.

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

I have so much to be thankful for. I won't get into it here because I'm pushed for time. I just felt I should give my little fan club an update on whats going on here.

Lastnight after leaving the gallery, I spoke to Eric via phone and we discussed things and it's pretty clear that it's over. He has said a lot of hurtful things lately, but I just let them roll off my back but the more I think about it, the more it angers me. When did I start caring about what people thought of me? I guess when someone you care about hurts your feelings, it bothers you. And Amaya's Law # 2 states that at anytime if someone tries to hurt your feelings purposely, just for the sake of hurting you, he's history. So after shedding some tears I came inside and Michael was on my home phone....

Michael & Jason were coming over to eat the famous Pumpkin Cookies in which everyone loves!!! They raided my fridge too! We all made peanut butter balls, talked shit about people and I of course kept answering Michael's phone when this chick Lyndsey kept calling his cell. I told her that Mike was at my house tonight and he's all mine and he's got his hands full right now so he couldn't come to the phone....TALK ABOUT PYSCHO!!! Little did she know the entire time we were peeing on ourselves at her neurotic behaviour. Micheal took the phone and told her it was over and she should have gotten the hint 2 weeks ago.

So Michael is such a sweetheart, he painted my toes and rubbed my feet. He wanted my toes Red because he is obsessed with red toenails--go figure. We all talked until 2 ish, and I finally said goodnight to call Kenny back. I'm not sure what time they actually left. Tonight after I get home from my grandma's, Michael is coming by and we're hanging out. What is with me & Michael's?! Tommorrow we're taking on black Friday too. Can't wait.

Have a good Thanksgiving people and I'll talk to you soon :)

Tiff--instead of just reading my journal, make one!!! Love ya, chica!!!

Lazy Sunday Afternoons

...Yeah, not so much. For the first time in forever I had a great day. My day started off with a great night of sleep where I didn't wake up at all, not even to T's call, (sorry T-man) I woke up @ 8:30 and saw the shine coming thru my bedroom. It's been so long since I acknowledged the sun!!! I took a long hot shower, did my hair and make-up and decided that I'd wear the first outfit that I put on :) That doesn't happen much!

I took my time getting dressed and I even thought I was running behind at times after curling my hair, but somehow time stood still for me this morning. I called my daddy and he was surprised that I was already dressed and ready. Again, this is rare so I understood the shock factor.

I met my family at church and I actually talked to my girl Tara who is doing fabulous :) Sonya and Shane are packing this week and are moving into their new home. We're having a going to have a Fashionista party as soon as she's settled. We're talking Make-up, handbags, jewelrey, etc :) All of our guilty pleasures into a huge slumber party will make us all happy women! And I got soooooo many compliments on my side ponytail--everyone loved. I do know how to make a statement if I do say so myself :) It had been too long since I actually got to do my hair.

The assembly was very nice. The message was on Thanksgiving and of course I was pondering all the things that I'm thankful for and I've compiled a list:

1) My Salvation--if I didn't have my convictions, my faith, and redeeming love I'd really be in trouble. I know in the end, everything will be okay. This is all just a test of my faith.
2) My family--My backbone. I consider my Mommy my best friend. Her strength and wisdom leave me in awe. If you know me at all, you know I'm a daddy's girl. Always will be. He's the one that makes everything okay, all the tiime. He's very strict and very loving at the same time. My sisters are my best friends too. Everyone knows how much I adore my brother(s) too. I cry everyday for my Brent, but he's with Roderick and they're all fine. Ian is my boy and he's always been very protective over my sisters & I. I love my Isaiah, Channy, & Matty. Love them boys to death!!!
3) My Health--I've endured a lot. I suffered from AML for a while which is probably the hardest battle I've ever fought, not to mention the scariest. I've had a lot of minor accidents, but today I'm fine. I'll get better.
4) Civilization--We live in a great country. It's slipping though. Morals what?!
5) Democracy--Freedoms. Speech. Religion. It means I get to share my thoughts on religion with anyone without being stoned like Steven!!!
6) My possessions--I complain a lot about not having the cutest LV bag, the newest Manolo Blahnik's or the latest Pink Marc Jacobs cashmere poncho that costs upwards of $5 g's! But I've been blessed. My friends go nuts in my closet. I get bored at times but I know that my cute burberry belt is haute couture :) I have a beautiful new home, a geeky lil car and a nice landboat.

I could go on forever, so I won't.

After the assembly I went shopping. I bought 3 yankee candles. Christmas Cookie--Yum :) I bought wrapping paper, sooooooo cute. I bought Kennedy and Emma some clothes all part of their Christmas gifts. Then I met my fam for Mexican which was too damn good. All those damn carbs, I couldn't resist the grease!!!

I parted ways with my family and went back to my house to find my grandpa there! He's getting worse :( He asked me if I'd talk to My lately. That broke my heart. We sat on the couch and watched Shrek 2. We both enjoyed it. It's been so long since I wrapped up in a blanket on my big sofa with my grandpa laughing with me watching a movie, I loved every second of it. We both fell asleep and I woke up to my girl Beckie Martin calling to hang out tonight. So I got dressed and my grandfather wanted to know whose Sheep I killed!!! He didn't like my freakin ugg's!!! He even said "Ugg is right"!! The man is hilarious.

Went to Beckie's house and she painted her casa which I loved, very nice. We talked, had a tea and then her daughter Erin wanted to do my hair, so she did and even gave me this lace headband that matched well with my attire which consisted of my Chloe jeans, a cream sweater with a cowl neckline, my Sheepskin coat with my uggs so it worked out well. The girls are becoming fashionistas much to Beckie's dispair. I'm even taking them Thrift store shopping tommorrow for some vintage stuff. We're on a mission to find Erin a Pashima to match her dress for her recital. She's playing a Back piece on Piano. These girls are so talented.

I came home, did laundry and now I'm sipping on a glass a wine. It relaxes me. Tommorrow, I'm sleeping in, NO MORE RENEE'S. I've gotta get my life back. I miss them both though. Dammit.

I've been trying to stay busy so I don't dwell on anything regaurding Eric. I cry everytime I think about it. It will all get better soon. I have faith.

So much for Chicago.

Now I have to get to bed, it's after midnight.

UGH,

I'm so freaking pissed right now. The people that I've basically put my life on hold for, for the past couple of months has talked down to me, horribly. I've done everything for these people for months now. I even get up in the middle of the night with her son so she can sleep. I wash his clothes, I clean her house, I do everything and then they attack me because I HOLD THE BABY TOO MUCH, AND I'M WEAK? BECAUSE I DON"T EAT HERE AT HER HOUSE, EVER!!! Forgive me for not likeing West Indie cuisine.

I'm done with all of this. This has all been stress for me. And I'm young, single but I live the life of a married mother of 2 (Renee & Reece) I'm done. NO more. Tommorrow is it.

I was up all night with Reece last night. He kept waking up and wanting to play @ 3 am! I wasn't having any of it. I had to sang to him in my groggy, I'm too tired for this voice!!! He seemed to enjoy. I'm good for something, dammit.

Eric, I read your emails. I'm still to frustrated to even comment on the situation. You lied, thats the bottomline. Why you did it is beyond me. Just because you were discussing restarants?! Again, I'm not stupid.

Nothing else to report.

Pyscho ex girlfriend of some random is IM'ing me. I'm going to fuck with her, just because I can :)

Another One

Eric and I had yet another fight. Seems to be about the same thing.........HIM

~9:30 ish I call Eric's office and he doesn't answer--I knew he has a huge presentation today and was working hard or so I thought, No answer at the office.

~ I call his cell. He immeadiately hung up on me!!! Just like Friday night at his party. WHAT THE FUCK?!

~ I call his cell back. This time he answers it, so he has balls. Before I can say anything he asks me to hang on for just a sec....I do. He's trying to hard to cover up the phone--it's very loud and I try to figure out what he's doing then I hear him talk. K....

~ I asked who he was talking to, he was very hesitant and even tried to change the subject--Wrong! So I ask him 3 timxes before he says, Kellie!

~ I started asking questions...as I should because my feelings were hurt--he declined my call to talk to Kellie whom he sees every freaking day? Then he hangs up on me, yet again? And when I start to ask questions he attempts to blame everything on me.

~ And he lied. He said he was away from his desk when I first called. Bullshit, bitch.

How am I supposed to act? This was just wrong. He then started bringing up other issues the whole "why don't you call when you say you will" shit.

I had an extremely tense, long, day and I had other things to do. I came home and crashed on my bed fully clothed and tried to call him except I wasn't important as Kellie. Who he spends a tremendous amount of time with. RED FLAG. I'm not stupid.

I was actually preparing to go back to Chicago but whats the use? I don't trust him. At all. Bottomline is he's just like all the other guys. They're shady.

In other news, Daddy went to the hospital in the middle of the night again. I haven't heard anything from Mom yet...hopefully everything is okay.

I'm sick and tired of bullshit. Seriously. I'm going on vacation soon. A long one.

Weekend Recap

This is the first time I've had an oppourtunity to update my journal in a while. I'm going out of town soon so I'm preparing for that.

Weekend Highlights--Dinner with 12-15 friends, we had a wonderful time. Cafe Milano is awesome. Eric and I had a huge fight. We talked things over a bit more on Sunday, they're getting better. Sunday night my friends and I just hung out and shot the breeze, nothing great. Overall fun weekend.


T--We have to talk soon :) We need a Maya & T talk, stat!

Since getting home around 12 ish, I'm super tired. I should know better than to stay out all night. I'm not 16 anymore.

I will be extremely busy the next couple of days but I will be checking my email periodically so all members of the Amaya Fan Club, feel free to email me @ either hotmail account.

Oh and I went to church yesterday :) Was a nice service too.


Later Masturbators!

The weather outside today is miserable. It's raining and it's cold out. No walk for Reece & I today :(

We were in his bedroom reading and I put on the Luther V CD and the little man came alive! He loves it. He keeps looking at pictures of himself iwth his father. It breaks my heart, I don't like for him to look. Speaking of weird, he laughs in his sleep, constantly! It's so crazy. Mom says that he's dreaming of angels :) That puts a smile on my face for sure!!!

I've cried a lot this morning mostly because it's weird that he's gone and he's never coming back.

Update

I've been spending tons of time with Renee & Reece lately. She needs all the help she can get right now.

I've noticed that I'm very picky about little things. I can't stand it when someone leaves dishes in the sink or 'science experiments' in glasses and refuses to wash them. I can't tolerate messy people at all.

So what drives you nuts?

I'm sitting here and I could go on forever, but just to name a few things:-People who drink out of the carton (i hate it, like if someone asks for a bite of my food, you can have the whole thing!)

-People who pull out infront of me when they see i am coming at a high rate of speed and just to go 35 miles per hour and i gotta break fast just to keep from ramming them. (mm ramming!)

-Hypocrits, i had a discussion on this today with a friend, looks down on others for doing wrong, but when they admit a wrong doing they have to bring the bible into it to try and justify their wrong doings.

-People who nit pick and bash others for no reason

-People who are indecisive. I hate when someone can't make up their mind "shall I wear the green scarf with the pink polka dots or the purple scarf with the strips"

-People who don't follow directions. Just let me drive, dammit!

------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm making plans to get to Chi town soon. I am going to swing by the Gallery and pick up some work after my dr's appt. I think it's going to be a good day. T is in Hawaii on bidness! I'm thuper jealous. Eric and I have been distant. I don't think he likes the fact that I spend an enormous amount of time with Renee & Reece. I'm going to work on that!

Reece is awake...gotta go :)

Update

I've been spending tons of time with Renee & Reece lately. She needs all the help she can get right now.

I've noticed that I'm very picky about little things. I can't stand it when someone leaves dishes in the sink or 'science experiments' in glasses and refuses to wash them. I can't tolerate messy people at all.

So what drives you nuts?

I'm sitting here and I could go on forever, but just to name a few things:-People who drink out of the carton (i hate it, like if someone asks for a bite of my food, you can have the whole thing!)

-People who pull out infront of me when they see i am coming at a high rate of speed and just to go 35 miles per hour and i gotta break fast just to keep from ramming them. (mm ramming!)

-Hypocrits, i had a discussion on this today with a friend, looks down on others for doing wrong, but when they admit a wrong doing they have to bring the bible into it to try and justify their wrong doings.

-People who nit pick and bash others for no reason

-People who are indecisive. I hate when someone can't make up their mind "shall I wear the green scarf with the pink polka dots or the purple scarf with the strips"

-People who don't follow directions. Just let me drive, dammit!

------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm making plans to get to Chi town soon. I am going to swing by the Gallery and pick up some work after my dr's appt. I think it's going to be a good day. T is in Hawaii on bidness! I'm thuper jealous. Eric and I have been distant. I don't think he likes the fact that I spend an enormous amount of time with Renee & Reece. I'm going to work on that!

Reece is awake...gotta go :)